Triton Shower Seville 8.5kw electric Under £80 exc. fitting Mira Shower Sport Max 9kw With AirBoost technology Keto Snacks Healthy snacks and treats For people on keto diet Music Streaming Access millions of songs For £10.99 a month

.. and still the domain name purchases have continued at unabated pace (guess that’s my bank balance f*cked next month)

Yup, I’ve bought more of the buggers… the latest and last being

I also came up with the idea that / might be a good name for a flights website & a good one for selling electronics / gadgets whether I park the domain or otherwise

I lost count at around 85 – 90, but created a full (and regularly updated) list of them here:

Also in addition to SEO services from Submitnet, my site now also has a domain name buying facility via SEDO – as well as the original intention of providing small businesses the opportunity to have a simple “web presence” webpage (which to date hasn’t had a single taker-upper, like the rest of my business).

2k7 Questionnaire

(originally posted to MySpace Bulletins, but it appears to be playing silly sods again there as usual and not showing!)

1) Where did you begin 2007?
In the livingroom watching SKY NEWS, or maybe BBC1 with the old git

2) What was your status by Valentine’s Day?
Bordering teetering on the edge of giving up completely, and thinking all those I wanted to hook up with hated me (pretty much same today, only worse)

3) Were you in school (anytime this year)?

4) How did you earn your money?
Unemployment benefit, a couple extra £££’s helping my grandma on Saturdays…. 2 or 3 small (<£8) wins on the Euromillions lottery, Dividend payments on my share portfolio, a pay-out from product review / surveys / comparison site Ciao, interest payments from the money I’ve got loaned out at ZOPA + a few £££’s earned from running AMAZON ASSOCIATES adverts on my websites.

5) Did you have to go to the hospital?
Nope… even despite my back going out on me 2/3 times, cutting my tongue on a knife licking curry off it, hurting my wrist while drying my hands on a tea towel + probably picking up several other stupid but painful injuries I’ve forgotten about.

6) Did you have any encounters with the police?
Twice at the end of May / beginning of June when some little twat stole my Nintendo DS Original, NEW Super Mario Bros game cart + my Nokia N-Gage phone.

Random bag check @ York Railway Station during a day trip down there in September.

7) Where did you go on holiday?
Nowhere…. ain’t had a holiday away from home since 1994, and can’t afford one either.

8) What did you pay for that was over $1000?
Nothing, I’ve been largely too skint to buy much all year.

9) Did you know anybody who got married?
Not that I can remember

10) Did you move anywhere?
No (only from my chair here at the computer, to the toilet and back again + to the shops and back, etc lol)

11) What concerts/shows did you go to?

12) Are you registered to vote?
Since 1997

13) Who did you want to win Big Brother?
Couldn’t give a crap about it.

14) Where do you live now?
Same place i’ve lived for the last 28yrs (apart from when I stayed at my Grandparents the first couple of times my Mum had brain tumours)….. flat above the family’s grocery store, just outside Whitby (and it’s marked on GOOGLE EARTH)

15) Describe your birthday.
Light snow / hailstones / forecast heavy showers…… none of my online friends bothered to send me a card / present / wish me happy birthday despite the effort I often go to to send the ones who’ve given me their snail-mail address something – the only one who did have a good excuse was stuck in Hospital in California recovering from major Spinal surgery.
Had about £55-£60 fall out of the cards from family, but it largely went towards trying to bring my bank balance closer towards being back in credit.
It was on 20th March, if anyone cares for future reference.

16) What’s one thing you thought you’d never do but did in 2007?
Start my own business –
but it’s been running since end of September, and the sales figures resemble the Pope’s sex life.

17) What has been your favorite moment?
Apart from getting my Fuji S6500fd (S6000fd) Digital camera, I think this year has largely been a series of kicks in the teeth.

18) What’s something you learned?
That relationships are largely a waste of time (unless anyone reading this wants to prove otherwise).

19) Any new additions to your family?

20) What was your best month?
I don’t think there’s been one

21) What music will you remember 2007 by?

22) Who has been your best drinking buddy?
The usual….. my right hand, and the fluff in my belly button

23) Made new friends?
No, but had plenty of people I thought were my friends kick me in the teeth

24) Best new friend?
Ummm….. nope, not really been seeking out new friends this year, as it’s getting rarer & rarer that I flick through profiles / penpal adverts and come across anyone I click with.
Had a few of my all time favourite online friends get back in touch with me (Christina G, Kat, Melly)……. but also had considerably more turn their backs on me for no good reason / ignore me for long periods of time, despite my best efforts to be “nice” (Catherine Q-T, Alicia, Alissa, Jessie H…..) – when that happens, they invoke the “JD Grudge” (when that’s triggered it can take years to make amends, no matter how hard they beg for forgiveness)….. and makes me even less inclined to bother go looking for replacement friends (the last one i felt any form of connection with was as long ago as 2005 from a Prison penpals website)

25) Favorite Night out?
I never have nights out

More Domain names!?

Early this morning, through ’til just before lunchtime I had the urge to bag a few more domain names:

and finally………

Of course I was laughing and pretty pleased with my purchases until the resuming of this week’s bad luck with getting hurt by some of those I consider my very closest online friends from the past 8yrs I couldn’t live without doing a pretty good job of trying to get struck off my list of people to get Christmas Cards & Presents for 🙁

JD’s Domain name purchasing rampage

Alright, so yesterday (Sunday) I had a bit of an urge to purchase a few extra domain names, and ended up with this little lot:

I think there were 24 of them in total, but I lost count a few times part way through. – I bought because I thought it was funny. Made my ribs hurt like hell. I was originally looking to see if was available, but some bugger had already registered that ‘un and was the funniest alternative (at least at the time).

Some were bought to try nudge some of my existing sites up the search rankings, while the rest were bought to try rake in a few extra quid either by creating yet another website of my own, or by Domain name parking via SEDO.

JD’s now in business

As some of you may know, I’ve now gone into business for myself.
Having been stuck on unemployment benefit since August 2000, and things looking as though I’d stand more chance of seeing Pamela Anderson running naked down the street outside than finding someone to take me on, I figured I may as well finally have a crack at starting my own business.

I was initially considering starting my own computer business, building & tweaking the things…. but that was ruled out when my “project PC” I’m now building this site on had me completely flummoxed as to why the hell it wouldn’t work, and I had to get a relative to finish it off when my previous desktop PC self-destructed from old age last December (2006)… but I can do memory upgrades if anyone wants me to.

I also ruled out selling crap on Ebay full-time due to the fact previous attempts at that have only resulted in the sale of 2 jigsaws, and being stuck with 3 or 4 watches I bought at wholesale off Ebay in the hopes of making a profit on them (anyone wanna buy a watch?).

Eventually I figured that as I was getting really rather good at photography….. especially having bought my first ever digital camera in March 2006, allowing my life-long snap happy tendencies to go totally unleashed, without being restricted by the restrictive number of shots a roll of film can take (and paying a small fortune to have it developped), I may as well have a shot at flogging a few of my pictures…. and maybe do a bit of website design on the side.
Eventually I figured that as I was getting really rather good at photography….. especially having bought my first ever digital camera in March 2006, allowing my life-long snap happy tendencies to go totally unleashed, without being restricted by the restrictive number of shots a roll of film can take (and paying a small fortune to have it developped), I may as well have a shot at flogging a few of my pictures…. and maybe do a bit of website design on the side.

To cut a long story short, it was finally launched as a genuine business on 24th September 2007 under the guidance of the Whitby Business Development Agency, with me having been “conscripted” onto the NEW DEAL 25+ Self-Employment option.

JD’s Photography & Web Design

Pass the ear plugs…….

Just been downstairs to the shop to see if I could find something for today’s lunch (no luck) + see if Postman Pat had been and brought me any mail today…. which he has, but just looks like something from NatWest bank.

The dippy limp wristed “victim support” lot have sent some annoying crap, including a stupid bloody “personal attack alarm”…. which the old git’s (my Dad) trying to force me, under duress to take with me next time I go to the bank for him……. geesh, he’ll probably be trying to force me to wear a dress + a bloody handbag next!
They’ve also sent a chime thingy that goes off when the door is opened, and it makes an annoying noise, similar to one of them musical greeting cards, or one of them reversing alarms…….. only worse. =\

Does anyone know the best way of shoving these bloody things up a “victim support” councillors rectum? >:(

F***ING THIEVING C**TS!!!!!!!!!

Stolen in a walk-in theft from the flat above the family grocery store on 31st May 2007 between 2:30pm – 4:45pm:

1x Nokia N-Gage mobile phone / Handheld games console (“Classic” version, not “N-Gage QD”)
Contained “Nokia Game” MMC memory card (as supplied with the console when new) with “FLO BOARDING” game (with some of my own files saved in the spare space on it) + a VODAFONE SIM card which no longer works after the “PAY AS YOU GO” account for it expired due to a technical fault involving having trouble getting a signal incurred since having the thing reflashed @ FONEFIX UK in York around August/September 2005, and having not made an outgoing call on it for 3-6months. Battery (Nokia BL-5C) flat at time of theft.
IMEI CODE: 351521000959122

1x Nintendo DS (original, aka “DS Fat”), in silver.
Paint was starting to fade around left side of control pad
Possible dead pixel on one of the screens, I think the bottom one
serial No. not available

1x “NEW Super Mario Bros” game cartridge for Nintendo DS (inside DS Game cart slot at time of theft)
Game save slot one saved @ Level 2 or 3 (when left off last time I played it), with about 75-80(ish) lives left having already run through and completed that saved game more times than I can be bothered to count!
Game save slot two saved @ Level 4
Game save slot three = empty

1x “The Simpsons: Road rage” game cartridge for “Nintendo Gameboy Advanced”.
Was in the “Gameboy Advanced” (GBA) cartridge slot at the front of my Nintendo DS @ time of theft (largely bought ‘cos it was cheap + I wanted something to fill that slot).

Both handheld consoles (Nintendo DS + Nokia N-Gage) are without chargers (due to the fact the theiving little twats left them where they were)

UPDATE: (5th June/5:10pm BST) – still no sign of the motherf*ckers, but suddenly remembered that the serial number on the Nintendo DS started with “S212”

Dumbass proof guide on how to fly fish….

It’s a bit of a long & complicated subject, so I’d highly recommend trying to get your hands on a copy of a book called “JOHN BAILEY’S COMPLETE GUIDE TO FLY FISHING” (which is a REALLY good book).
Here’s the ISBN numbers to help you find it on Amazon
ISBN-10: 1843305666
ISBN-13: 978-1843305668

but the general gist of how to go about it.
1) get all your gear together:
– Rod, Reel + Flyline…. usually a set-up with an AFTM weight rating of 5-6 or 6-7 will see you good for most types of freshwater fly fishing.
– Leader material…. personally I just use ordinary monofilament, instead of some of the more fancy ones. This is used to attach the fly to your fly line (which is too thick to pass through the eye of the hook, hence the need for leader material).

– Forceps…. used for unhooking fish with
– Priest…. if you intend to take fish home to eat (such as a trout), this is used to HUMANELY clonk it on the head, and put it out of it’s misery.
– Cap + polarised sunglasses…. essential largely for personal safety reasons (it’s better to accidently hook them when casting than it would be to hook your unprotected eyeballs, for example)….. they have the added benefit of reducing glare from the water and give you a better chance of spotting things under the surface.

– a selection of flies… these are used for bait, and are basically hooks that have been tarted up with various materials to make it resemble an insect of some description. The 2 main types (of which there are more varitions than you’d believe was humanly possible) are “Wet flies” which are fished under the surface of the water, and “dry flies” which are fished on the surface of the water.

– A couple of fly boxes…. basically used to safely store the flies you aren’t using inside your pocket or tackle box. Mine have foam inserts inside so you can neatly arrange them with the pointy bit of the hook stuck into them so you can easily see what you’ve got available without stabbing yourself in the fingers. I keep mine in 2 seperate boxes… one for wet flies, the other for dries (as otherwise I can never remember which are which)..

Step 2 is learning to cast….. the age old method is to practise in a field or your back garden (if it’s big enough)… at this stage you only need to set up the rod, reel + fly line… as these where all the casting weight is, and you don’t really need to bother with the leader + flies until you’re actually out fishing. Passers-by may think you might have escaped from the local mental hospital when they see you practising this way, but it does work.
One main thing to know when you first try fly casting is “never wear clothes with drawcords on them”, because unlike other forms of fishing, your flyline when you are casting & retrieving it is usually dangling round your feet (instead of being reeled tight back onto the reel)…. and as a result you usually end up getting the drawcords tangled up with your flyfishing line (which usually results in some rather colourful language while trying to untangle it all).
The other thing you should be on your guard for, is I found the flyline usually falls back down through the rod rings / line guides (whatever you prefer to call them) the first few times you try it.

To start off casting, grip the handle of the rod in your right hand (or in your left if left handed), then pull enough line off the reel until it’s about down to your knees… then with the thumb & forefinger of your left hand, grip hold of the line so the bit nearest the first rod ring / line guide is tight (and the bit nearest the reel is hanging down)…. flick the rod up, so the end of the line is behind you, then you got to start flicking it back and forth to build some casting energy into the rod (it’s a bit like hammering in a nail with a hammer)……. then eventually on a forward thrust (timing is critical) release the line from between your fingers and it should get the line out.
It’s actually a little more complicated than that, and better explained in the book I suggested. Most experts liken the stages of positioning the rod during casting to the face of a clock (e.g. 12 O’Clock = rod pointing straight up, etc).

Once you’ve figured out how to flycast, and get some distance, the next stage is trying to work on doing it with some accuracy (I usually try to pick a target, and cast to it).

After that (usually achievable with a couple of hours practise), it’s usually best to book a couple of sessions with a flycasting instructor to go from being able to do the basic idea of doing it, to actually being good at it.

Step3… is when you actually get out fishing. It’s probably best to start off at an artifically stocked lake / reservoir rather than a wild river, and to take only the bare essentials as when fly fishing you usually have to be prepared to stay mobile and go looking for the fish, rather than casting at a random piece of water, hoping a fish comes to you…. it also gives you chance to see what insects are flying around near the water, to give you an idea of what the fish are feeding on, so you can try find a good match among your selection of flies.
After that it’s fairly straight forward…….. just try stick to a 1 fly set-up, rather than try to be clever with a 2 – 3 fly set up until you’ve got the hang of it (otherwise you stand more chance of getting in a tangle) + also take a good look around before starting to cast to make sure you ain’t gonna take someone out with your fly if you make a balls-up.

(based on a reply I gave on YAHOO Answers, after I succumbed to boredom and give the dump one last strike before it’s out).

If I won £10million on the lottery…….

I been thinking of this rather alot lately, and here’s what I’ve thought up so far……..

£950,000 in my Halifax Websaver account, so if the interest rate stayed at it’s current 4.75% that’d be £45,125 a year interest earned on it (a nice little annual wage) + the same again in my old Liquid gold account (£9,120 a year in interest – should pay for the christmas shopping I guess)

That leaves £8,100,000 to play with, so knock off another £30,000 to max out my allowance for holding premium bonds (seeing as I’m firmly of the belief that once you strike it rich, you try to ensure you stay filthy rich) = £8,070,000

Take another £1million and split between the 35 or so friends & family on my Christmas card list (about £28,571 each)

After that, it’s playtime with the remaining £7,070,000
Driving lessons & tests = £350
Pair of fully restored Mini coopers c. £20,000
MG Midget c. £6000
Ferrari 348 c. £30,000
Ferrari F355 c. £40,000
Ferrari F430 c. £169,000
Toyota MR-2 Series2 c. £3,000
Vauxhall Zafira VXR £23,000 (to go fishing in)
Lotus Elise c. £10,000
pair of fully modded Series1 & 2 Subaru Impreza Turbo’s c. £20,000
Nissan Skyline GT-R R33 V-Spec c. £5,500
= £326,500 worth of motors + maybe set aside another £750,000 on insuring them + building a HUGE barn to store them in / work on them.

So, that’d leave another £5,993,500

Next up I think I’d blow $299,000 (£151,221) on this 1964 SAAB J35 DRAKEN jet fighter
Upto £100,000 on a custom built canal narrowboat
Princess50 Motorboat – £425,000

Finally, I guess I’ll just stick £1,125,000 (ish) on a house or two……. which leaves £4,192,279 earning about £4,192 a year interest in my bank account (typical 0.1% interest rate), which I guess I’d just spend on visiting Formula1 races when I felt like it or go visit my many online friends dotted around the world (or bring them over to see me).

Nearly forgot spending around £10,000 on fishing tackle so I was FINALLY fully equipped for once.

Best of all, I’d do my absolute best to rub in the fact I was now loaded and make every little tosspot who picked on me at school + every girl I knew since school who turned me down for brain dead lager louts extremely jealous.

Talk about taking ur bloody time…….

Back on August 25th 2006, I ordered a webcam off for my best friend Michelle/Rainn’s birthday in early September, thinking it would arrive quicker that mailing one from here in England.

Quicker my ass……. after several e-mails alerting me of there being a delay, they finally sent the sodding thing on April 10th 2007, not long after she’d blinkin’ well moved after having her house repossessed.

Geesh……… I could have walked through the Channel Tunnel, trekked across Europe & Siberia, swam across the bloody Bering Straight, popped into California to pay my prison penpal Cindy a conjugal visit along the way, and still got a bloody webcam to Akron (Ohio) from England faster than that! Even if I made the sodding webcam myself by supergluing together all the individual atoms one-by-one it would have been faster.